12-17-12
By: Felecia
Williams
Title: No one should have to suffer losing a loved one to suicide

We often lose sight of how precious life can be and how quickly it can be taken
away. So many families are left heart broken by a loved one who has chosen death
instead of life. We must as a community educate ourselves and reassure one
another that, there is hope during and after the storm.
Suicide should never be an option.

At 10:00pm a woman receives a call from her youngest child’s
father, whom at the time was 28 years old and a newly wed. Crying hysterically,
he tells her that he is a poor excuse of a man and does not deserve to live. The
woman asks for his current location and reassures him that whatever is happening
will be alright and that she will help him overcome whatever is bothering him.
She then mutes the phone and tells those around her that he is talking foolishly
as if he wants to die. Her friend advises her to take his words seriously and
her sister insists that she speak with him. After taking the phone off mute the
woman then tells the man that someone wishes to speak to him and passes the
phone on to her sister. Once on the phone the sister says “Hello. Hello. Are you
there?” All she could hear were cars going by in the background but the man was
not responding. The man in this story was parked in front of his home on a busy
street at the time. Unknowingly to the woman, he had purchased a gun the day
before, and during those few moments that the woman passed the phone to her
sister, he had placed a .35 millimeter pistol in his mouth and pulled the
trigger. He left his new wife, 3 children, their 2 mothers, and the rest of his
family and friends behind.

In the African- American community suicide is committed on
average at 6 deaths per day and is growing. That leaves at least 6 survivors
(family and friends of a loved one who died by suicide). what can we do to help?
Well, we can start off by familiarizing ourselves and others of the risk factors
and warning signs associated with this growing
epidemic.

All suicide indicators should be taken seriously, just as the
friend who had advised the woman in the story. In this case it was already too
late to intervene; the man had reached his breaking point. But the 80% of those
who do commit, at some point they give off warnings of their intent to do so. As
stated in the story, purchasing the gun was one, but there would have been
others prior to that. A person with acute risk for suicidal behavior most often
times will:


. Threaten to hurt or kill themselves or talk of wanting to hurt
themselves.

. Look for ways to kill themselves, by seeking access to guns,
pills, poisons or other means.

. Talk or write about death.

Based on the story told here we don’t know what the issues were
or what occurred prior to having bought a gun. But the thought or decision to
harm one’s self can stem from several risk factors in one’s past or present, and
may predispose a person to such actions. So what are the
signs?

To start off, here’s an easy to remember Mnemonic is: 

IS PATH WARM?


I - IDEATION (thoughts of committing)

S - SUBSTANCE ABUSE (alcohol or drug use)


P - PURPOSELESSNESS (no reason for living)

A - ANXIETY (agitation, unable to sleep or sleeping all the time)

T - TRAPPED (feeling there’s no way out)

H - HOPELESSNESS (no hope)


W - WITHDRAWAL (withdrawing from friends, family and society)

A - ANGER (rage, seeking revenge)

R -– RECKLESSNESS (engaging in risky activities)

M -MOOD CHANGE (sudden elation or depression)

It is possible that the man could have been suffering from
several factors that lead him to taking his own life that night; he may have
even made previous attempts. In this case he chose to use a gun to do so. 

The man could have also had a psychiatric disorder. Most suicidal people suffer
from depression but still manage their daily lives and don’t appear to be
ill. They may experience severe panic attacks, insomnia and
agitation. It’s possible that even a close family member or friend may have died
of suicide. A few other known triggers are: school problems, low self-esteem,
lack of fear of danger, family conflicts, stressful life events, preoccupation
with death ,and health problems.

The woman in the story may not have seen any signs at all and if
so she did not think they were an issue. That is why it is up to us as a
community to learn and educate ourselves on the warning signs. So like the
family left behind in this example, we don’t have to suffer losing a loved one
by suicide.

By using the information provided in this article you will be
able to identify and act should anyone you know show signs. Seek help as soon as
possible by contacting a mental health professional or by calling the National
Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK and if necessary immediately dial
911. For more help, tips, and facts visit, www.suicidepreventionlifeline.orgor www.suicidology.organd remember “when it seems like there is
no hope…there is help!”

Date:  October 14, 2012
Writers Name:  Rosey Denise White
Title:   Secretly Waiting for Death

Admittedly, I have experienced many hardships throughout my life.   I know what it’s like to not have a job, a car, clothes, food and many other basic needs that so many of us take for granted. Despite these difficulties, the hardest challenge in my life has been dealing with the loss of my mother.   I know first-hand the emotional struggles of longing to live, yet secretly waiting to die.

After several months of unexpected deaths and violence within my family unit, everyone was stunned to learn my mother was a victim of pancreatic cancer disease.   Although she was naturally small in stature, she had the spirit of a giant!  My mother was the unspoken matriarch of the family.  A very strong woman both mentally and physically, who was full of wisdom and commanded respect from all she knew.  The timing of her illness and death was quite abrupt.  I never considered what life would be like without her.  Mentally, I was unprepared for it.  I always expected mom to be around when I got married.  I expected she would be here to see me start my own family and would help me transition into adulthood.  Unfortunately, my mother will miss all of these things.   

Her death shook the very foundation of my family and the core of my being! Shortly after her death I remember driving down the road in my car, asking, begging God to call my number. I hope this is the day, I often thought to myself. I imagined a big truck hitting my car or some other freak accident to abruptly end my life.  Outwardly I yearned to live, but adjusting to life without mom was too difficult for me.  I no longer had that unmovable piece in my life that provided security, instruction and comfort.  In my mind there was no real purpose for my life to go on.  My family had moved on with their lives and I became a distant afterthought.  I had no one waiting in the wings for me.    All of this heavily weighed on my mind.  Secretly, I wanted to end it all and waited eagerly for death to greet me.  

Suicide doesn’t have to be an orchestrated elaborate plan.  There are people we encounter on a daily basis who have thoughts of death without us even knowing. The pressures of everyday life can be overwhelming for some and not everyone has the strength or will to cope.  Those with suicidal thoughts are usually withdrawn from others.  They may also engage or over engage in illicit drugs and alcohol.  Someone who is considering suicide may also appear quite normal to those around them. Truthfully, there are very few tangible warning signs that reflect a person’s willingness to die.  To this day, no one within my family or circle of friends were ever aware of my attraction to death.  

Rather than recognizing the potential warning signs of suicide, the most important thing we can do is become supportive of those undergoing a change in life.  Be it tragedy of death, financial hardships, a failed relationship or other challenges, those in the circle should always give the appearance of support. Compassion is something that not enough of us engage in.   Be willing to step in when needed.   Be willing to become a non-judgmental listening ear to those who need you.  A phone call, a letter, a text message- are all small jesters of love that can go a long way, especially to those with suicidal thoughts.  The words we speak toward others are very important.  Words generate negative and positive energy. Be mindful that your words can often be the rope that sends someone over the edge… or the harness that safely draws them back.

Date: 9/11/2012
Writer’s Name: Reginald Antione Ward
Title: The Warning Signs of Suicide


When dealing with depression leading to suicide, some of the warning signs are carefully visible. In some other cases, the signs are not there at all. We as people only expose what we want to be exposed. In some cases those seeking help, reach out to others for that help. In some suicide cases, the person covers it up and just wants to end their life for many reasons. I have never personally known anyone who has actually took their own life, but I have come across suicidal individuals.

Some of the warning signs are when individuals stay to themselves, closed up in their rooms, or are dealing with rejection from others. Those who have low self-esteem or those who have been bullied are high risk as well. Individuals that are feeling unloved are also at risk for committing suicide. When a person all of a sudden removes themselves from their normal surroundings is another warning sign. 

The question is how do we help those dealing with this mindset? How do we work with them? I believe it’s all in the mindset of the individual. We all must love. We must let everyone surrounding us know that they are loved no matter what. We were all given a life and it’s sad because we as people can help lower someone’s self-esteem. I cannot imagine what those who have committed suicide must have been going through mentally. The feeling of being alone, the feeling of feeling unwanted. Thinking about the feeling of thinking no one loves you or the feeling of even thinking that your life is over.

Suicide is not a game and it is truly up to us to really check on our friends, whether they are sad or happy. Talking things out and letting the people we associate with know we are there for them is also helpful.

Many times there signs when someone wants to commit suicide, and at other times it
just happens out of nowhere. Many times people say, “I had no idea”- referring to one who has committed suicide successfully or attempted suicide. We all have to just stay prayed up because each person’s mindset is very different and you never know what the next person is going through. Usually, when real famous celebrities suddenly commit suicide, it becomes the biggest shock to society. This goes back to my point, which is, no matter if the signs are there or not, we never truly know what is going on in the mindsets of others. Depression is no joke, and depression at times leads to suicide attempts. We have to all wake up and pay attention to the people surrounding us and look at the big picture. We all struggle with something, and we should never judge another person’s struggle, but yet encourage them through it all. The next person who attempts suicide could very well be one of the people in our lives that we least expect.

Date: 8/11/14
Writer’s Name: Dominique Wilkins
Title: What Won’t Kill You…

   

I remember watching the Aladdin cartoon with Robin Williams’s voice as the genie, when he said, “I may not die, but it is amazing what you can live through!” Hearing that stuck with me for years to come! There are people going through some serious crap in this world that we are living in today. It would be so very depressing if everyone shared with you half the things that they go through at home!
   

In the past, it was obvious to point out someone who seems to be going through personal issues. Often, they would be brought on by life changes. Such as moving away from their normal environment, a divorce, a death or a serious illness in the family would be the normal triggers. Immediately afterward, you would see the person become withdrawn from their normal activities, or depressed and disinterested in group involvement. They could either be affected by a massive weight loss or weight gain to name a couple visual changes…
   

Now, there are tons of things to choose from and now, a person may be dealing with multiple life altering events at once! For example Theresa is married with 4 children, all under the age of 12. Each child is approximately 3 years older than the next one. One day, as she gets up to go to work to the job she’s held for over 6 years, she is involved in a terrible car accident. Fortunately, she lives, but the car doesn’t, nor does the pedestrian that her car slid into when it spun out of control. She did not have any identification on her at the time because she was moving so fast, that she only remembered to take her briefcase with her work and laptop in it.
   

At the hospital, she arrived in a coma. No one knows who she is or who to contact. Her boss was so angry with her for not showing up at such an important meeting with a valuable client, she was emailed her pink slip to her laptop. Her oldest child, a special needs child, who had been dying to show some responsibility for once, realized that mom was late picking them up and would show her how helpful he was by picking up his siblings and walking them the mile home. He could see how proud she would be when she found that the four of them had successfully crossed two of the largest intersections in Chicago. Unfortunately, the 9 year old knew this was not right, so she and the youngest one stayed at the school and decided to wait outside for her mother to show up, instead of leaving with the other two who were going against their mother’s rules.
   

The two children that stayed at school did not know their address. They only knew their mother’s cellular number and did not know her real name. They only knew to call her Mommy. The two at the school, still standing outside an hour after the bell, saw a lady, whom they knew their mom had conversations with, suggested that they go home with her and call from the warm house and wait there until she came. They did because they had seen their mom talk to this lady plenty of times, while they waited in line for the morning bell. They must be friends! The lady’s house was warm, but had a lot of really mean looking guys there smoking. Strange looking people would knock on windows and pass small bags and money through them every few minutes. As they left the 5th message for their mom on her voicemail, a thump on the door rang out and in the air! In came the police! It was a raid!! Everyone was taken out of the house and into custody, including them…
   

The special needs child and his sibling were out on their mission to go home, when they met a nice man who asked if they were lost and offered to drive them home. He thought that would be perfect because he had gotten tired of walking and this way they would get home faster. They jumped in the car, gave him the address and sat back to soak in the heat and get off their feet. The nice man told them that he needed to stop for gas first, but would take them home right afterward, which was fine. Mom does that to them all of the time. He was doing just like his mother did, driving out of his way, just to save gas. Tired from the walk and the excitement, they decided to close their eyes for a moment. At least until they got to the gas station…
   

While Theresa was in a coma at the hospital and her children were split up, going in their separate directions, her husband was on the other side of town, making up his mind finally with the decision that he had been fighting with himself to make. He would have put it off as long as he could, but with a lot of prodding from a close family friend, he was finally convinced. Today was the day that he would mail the note. He by no means had the guts to do it any other way. He sent and signed by certified mail his intent to vacate the premises and his divorce decree for his wife to sign. He was tired of living the double life with Theresa and the other with her girlfriend. Sharon was right; he needed to stop the circus. Stop the lies. He had hurt Theresa long enough. He left her the house and everything she needed to live comfortably. After he and Sharon had settled in completely, he would reach out to her in a month to tie up loose ends.
   

Theresa amazingly enough had awaken out of her coma, after two weeks. Immediately, her memories of the accident’s events came flooding back to attack her consciousness. She screamed out in pain from the images flashing across her mind, as she visualized the pedestrian being struck and killed. Moments later, as the images subsided, she was able to take in her surroundings and piece together her whereabouts. As the machines she was attached to began to alert the caretakers of her consciousness, she now needed more answers!! Where is her family? Will she be alright? When can she get out of there and how long had she been there in the first place?!
   

 The nurse was nice enough to calm her and assure her that after taking her vitals and doing a status update, that she would first get some much needed information from her and then provide her with a phone to contact her family and alert them of her location and situation. The nurse brought a doctor back who smiled so widely, Theresa thought that he had to been in the wrong room! There was nothing to smile at here! Yet, he felt otherwise! He shared with her the miracle of her recovery. How she had minimal physical injuries and was sharp as a tack mentally! Based off of her evaluation, he would allow her to discharge at the end of the week. So, with that, she was given a phone to make her calls…
   

She first called her husband so that she could speak to the kids to tell them she loved them and missed them, but it kept going straight to voicemail. So, she called her mother, who was so surprised to hear from her, but would not stop crying to let her really talk. After a minute or two of this, she snapped for her to stop crying and tell her where was her husband and children.  She wanted him to bring them to the hospital right away so that she could see them. Her mother, knowing how Theresa hates to be put off, came out with it. She told her that she had come over to her house to look for her when she had not answered her phone or returned several of her messages and noticed that when she too called her husband’s phone it was unavailable.
   

 She used her key to find that the mail had stacked up and it looked like a ghost town and while she was there, the certified letter had come for her to sign, which she did. When she noticed that it was oddly enough from her husband, she decided to open it and found that he had left Theresa for her best friend. With this news, she began to look for the kids and found that none of them had showed up for school again. They were missing too. Her mother cried and said that since then, the police have contacted her to identify the bodies of the two children and the others are in protective custody, for life, since they were found in a drug house and no one came and got them…
   

Theresa hung up the phone on her mother just then and pumped the pain medicine more than warned. She had no reason not to. Stick a fork in her. She was done…

Date: 08/6/2012
Writer’s Name: Tyeisha Downer
Title: Suicidal Thoughts


I wonder if I died, would tears come to her eyes.
Forgive me for my disrespect, forgive me for my lies
My babies' mother’s 8 months, her little sister's 2
Who's to blame for both of them
I swear to God I want to just slit my wrists and end this bullshit
Throw the Magnum to my head, threaten to pull
And squeeze until the bed's completely red
I'm glad I'm dead, a worthless  buddah head
The stress is building' up, I can't,
I can't believe suicide's on my ' mind
I want to leave, I swear to God I feel like death is calling' me
But no you wouldn't understand
You see its kind of like the crack did to Pookie, in New Jack
Except when I cross over, there ain't no coming' back
Should I die on the train track, like Remo in Beat street
People at the funeral fronting' like they miss me
My baby momma kissed me but she glad I'm gone
She knew me and her sister had something' goin' on
I reach my peak, I can't speak,
call my nigga Chic, tell him that my will is weak.
I'm sick of niggas lying', I'm sick of people hawking',
matter of fact, I'm sick of talking'.


Bang! Just like that you heard the gun go off and my favorite rapper Notorious Big was dead on the song suicidal thoughts. The words listed above were the lyrics to the late Notorious BIG although some of the words were explicit and raw and uncut. He was very verbal when he had the thoughts of suicide floating through his mind in the song. Many individuals do different things when they’re contemplating taking their life; some are very vocal others lose interest in their appearance. Many start giving their possessions away. Many individuals feel like they’re a rebel without a cause. Many of us sing many different songs; each song indicates a different meaning. Maybe if we studied human behavior and put our own selfish ways to the side to say a few kind words and pay attention to another human being versus pointing our fingers and raving about things that have no purpose, we could prevent someone from committing suicide.

Many of us are similar in more ways than one; and though we have different backgrounds we have similar stories. It’s important to be in tune with your surroundings and pay attention to details and the people around you. We have to realize that although we walk to the beat of our on drums, we share one rhythm.

It’s possible for us to overlook signs that are as clear as day. When was the last time that you took time out of your busy day to be a listening ear for a troubled person? Maybe a person just needed to vent and feel like somebody actually cared for that moment. Many of us feel incomplete within and allow the things in everyday life to reflect the problems we are facing. The least we can do is try to make a difference and be attentive to another’s need. There are many people with suicidal thoughts on their mind, but if we changed our behavior and ways of thinking we may be able to save a life versus someone taking their own life. Think about It.

Date: July 17, 2012

Name: Tamyara Brown

Title: You are Stronger than you think you are!


I sat in the doctor's chair telling her my grief

Sharing my fears of this strife in my life

I felt weak and less of a woman

Every woman I knew was strong as a rock

They could handle raising a family of six

They could handle dealing with a son who was sick

Chemo treatments and a bald head

They make strides with Breast Cancer

It's okay I can handle anything

I can stand the rain

That’s what she told the woman in the mirror

The man she loved was sentenced twelve years to life.

Now here I go alone again  

Stop complaining

Black women keep it inside

I was supposed to be made of my ancestor’s strength

Don't I dare die and fall apart

Four years ago that's how the woman in the mirror felt

She wanted to quit and let the feeling conquer her

Lying in the bed not wanting to get up

She had no time to be sad

 The woman in the mirror looks just like

ME

She had a family to take care of

 She had a job to go to

Her room is a mess

It's a reflection of how she feels inside

She had doctor appointments to attend

She wore sweat pants and a raggedy ponytail

 A fake smile plastered on her face.

It's a reflection of myself

She told crude jokes about herself trying to laugh only to cry

She was so unhappy with herself

She didn't sleep

She didn't talk to friends turning off her phone

She finally went and got help when she cried

All day while no one was home

And she couldn't stop

She sat in her doctor's chair and she said

You’re depressed.

The woman in the mirror felt as if she was a failure

She felt embarrassed that on top of everything else

She suffered from Depression

Black women don't melt when the going gets tough

We stand strong and solid

Yet at night she cried for hours in the mirror

After awhile all she wanted to do was rest

Didn't even want to get dressed

It was clear Tamyara was stressed

But never in a million years did I think it would affect me

I knew what going through hell felt like

I handled it all too well or

Did I?

I went for twelve weeks singing my Blues

I vented

I cursed

After the twelfth week

I felt so much better.

I needed to free the hurt in me

Needed to talk without judgment

Or interruption

Needed to say what I felt without

Drama

Needed that hour not to be

Mama

And

Everything to every one

When I released

I wrote again

When I released

I sat myself free

When I released

The woman in the mirror

Could find beauty in her eyes

“Tamyara P. Brown get out of the bed and fight. You are a fighter. I will not let you just lie down and die. Now you have the power to make it happen. Your journey is not over yet. You are stronger than you think you are.”

Tears streamed down my face, my heart heavy with pain as the bottle of pills sat next to me I was thinking of doing the unthinkable. I planned on ending my life because in my mind I thought my children where better without me. Life had beaten me down with my son being ill and losing my job. Every day it seemed as if something was happening causing me to sink deeper into depression.

I sat in the same room for two days refusing to come out because I was re-evaluating my life and with each hour drifting deeper into my blues of feeling inadequate. I felt like I could not get out of bed and face another day. It seemed as if I was speaking and the world couldn’t hear me and I was invisible. Everyone seemed too busy, or didn’t want to hear my blues. I felt as if no one understood what it was like to be different, to be lonely with a house full of children, dealing with a sick son and the lost of feeling unworthy to live. Yet, I had not shared with anyone the pain I was feeling. It was weighing me down and it was when I got the biggest surprise on the night I planned to end it all and it made me become a witness that God is amazing.

A voice entered the dark room first calling my name and for a moment I refused to answer because I was not only sad but also angry with everyone including myself.  The voice called out again,

“Tamyara Pamela Brown. You are stronger than you can ever imagine. All you ever endured… You’re so close to the blessings God is going to shower you with. Please pray with me and you will feel better.”

“I don’t want to. Please just leave me alone, I’m tired I need rest and tomorrow it will be all over. Tell me why life had to always be hard for me, huh? Why is my life a mess and not filled with success? So many of my friends are two steps ahead of me and look at me a mess. I pray I’m as good as I can be to people, I work hard and am caring. God why can’t you give me a break?”

A light illuminated my room and a man dressed in white walked towards me and touched my hand. I was startled and overwhelmed because I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.  He kneeled beside me and recited the Lord’s Prayer and I too began to pray with him. An instant calm came over me. In the moment he appeared he had disappeared again. I could have been dreaming but it gave me the strength to push forward. I got out of the bed and restored my faith in life; though this process didn’t happen overnight. I got out the bed, opened my blinds and took a shower. I felt the sun shine on my face; I prayed and let God restore my faith in life and myself.

We are faced every day with difficulties; some we breeze through and we go on about our business. Some difficulties can knock us out and over but that does not mean to give up. I guess I am a fighter in every aspect of the word because when I was down and the referee was counting me out, but I slowly rose at the number 8. Some have called me an unusual fool to take the blows life has thrown at me and find reason to smile. If they only knew how hard I fought to get to this place in my life where I have faith over fear. How I have just started to have faith in myself. If people knew how I cried and walk out the door the next day as if nothing ever happened. How I struggled to recognize my greatness and talents.

Some of our defining moments are rising out of mess and creating miracles when we think all is lost. Some of the challenges we face are to make us stronger, to give us a will to fight fear, fight depression and suicide. Never be ashamed to express your hurt. Get help if you need it. Seek counseling, and spiritual guidance. Lastly don't be afraid to ask for help.  If you or someone you love shows these signs listed below please don't be afraid to get them help. Depression is a serious disease.

© 2012 Tamyara Brown- Tamluvstowrite

Date:  July 16, 2012       

Author: Norlita Brown   

Title: Mind My Feelings

The belt was pressed tightly around my thorax. I didn’t know the medical term then, all I knew is that if I held on tight enough, soon it would be over. My eyes felt like they were bucking, my head seemed to be losing oxygen. I was nearing the finish line, though I was coherent enough to see my sisters come into the room and laugh at the spectacle before them. When they realized it was no laughing matter they ran for help. My mother’s friend ran up to our bedroom and immediately began prying my hands from the belt. He was strong but my will was stronger. I was determined to put an end to this tragedy. Life kept dishing me meals I wouldn’t serve to my worst enemy so now, I was dishing one back. No longer would anyone have me around to taunt, tease or ridicule. I refused to be the brunt of another joke gone wrong. Taking matters into my own hands also meant that I had succumbed to taking my life. Suicide was my only option. He was relentless, he wouldn’t stop. I suppose part of me didn’t want him to. Maybe I didn’t want to die. Maybe this wasn’t an attempt to lose my life but to save it. I gave in and loosened my hands from the belt. I had tried in so many ways to let them know that their words hurt; the pain was unbearable for me. I was a KID! For crying out loud, how much do you expect me to handle? How strong do you want me to be when all I hear is negative things? I have no friends, no family to show me they care. What do you want from me? My brain was screaming questions my mind didn’t have the strength to answer. I wanted to be happy, live a normal life, but they didn’t want me to have it. Not without changing who I was or who I wanted to be.

SUICIDE. Our children are taking their life in their own hands and calling it quits - giving up on life so soon. Then there are those who aren’t young and have decided now is the time. Why do we feel this way? Yes, I said we. I have been where they are. I have been where many are wishing to be. It’s not pretty; in fact it’s an ugly sight to behold. Suicide is what we’re not looking at; we are not trying to understand what could put someone in a mindset to want to end their life. How many tragedies must one suffer before they fold? Many strong-willed and determined people look down on those of us who attempt suicide or worse, succeed. But I must ask very honestly, have you ever suffered what we have? Should there even be a comparison? If your shoulders are built to carry boulders and mine can barely hold pebbles, am I flawed? Isn’t that the very reason that suicide is so prevalent? The judgment of others.

There is a wonderful collection of poetry out right now where two young teenagers discuss an array of subjects but amongst them is suicide. They are talking about it in the thick of the moment. It is what our children are facing right now. Unspoken, Barely Written: A Teenage Torment is a must read. It can help so many teenagers understand that the problems they have are not theirs alone, but there are others who are enduring the very same thing. It can show them that there is another way out – to write about it and speak about it. Push forward to make change. Being silent, doing nothing or worse taking your life only allows the issues to fester for the next generation. Within this same book is a poem by Toni Hodges that is truly one of my favorites. She’s not discussing suicide within it but the depth of her words gives meaning and understanding to the things we take for granted.

 



They're just feelings:
My clumsy emotions falls out of their hiding place.
Disheveled scattered before you.
Stepping over them you say "they're just feelings"

Well, these feelings were once buried deep

in a place no one had yet to discover,
until you came and drained them in array
My soul crept out of its cave and shone a light on you
 A light you drowned with darkness
Uncontrollably I stumbled into your hands
But you let me fall along with these emotions
Now here I am gathering them in a pile
Attempting to find them a better home
While you repeat “They're just feelings"
 

~Toni

I thank God that I can now say that I’m stronger; that those thoughts left me in my teen years. But there are so many who are dealing with this tragic state daily. How can you help? First things first. As it has always been said, there is no better place to begin than with YOU. If, and I say if because it doesn’t apply to everyone, but if you are a person who uses others as your form of entertainment then stop it! By this I mean, are you looking at someone and ridiculing them publicly because they have decided to be different than you are? Embrace their need to identify with themselves uniquely; stop trying to box them into your identity. Watch how a person reacts and responds to your jokes, if they are quiet or give a look of hurt in any form then you may want to do something to counteract the pain you just caused because you have no idea what else they may be dealing with. So rather than becoming the last straw, make every effort to become the first step to their healing. If you are not the jokester but you see that someone is going through some things that are too tough for them to handle, elect to be their friend. Elect to give them hope. Elect to save a life. If you are someone in need of someone to talk to, you can reach out to me or the National Suicide Prevention Hotline by dialing (800) 273-TALK (8255).

Date: 7/09/2012   
Writer’s Name: S.F. Hardy
Title: Signs of Suicide

 

Suicide is known as the silent killer in the African-American community. Although it affects everybody, nobody wants to talk about it or the situations and conditions leading up to the culmination of suicide. Even though talking is most likely a proactive means of prevention, it remains taboo.



According to MedicineNet.com, “30,000 people reportedly kill themselves each year in the United States. Suicide is the third leading cause of death for people 10-24 years of age.” A report conducted by the American Association of Suicidology in 2005 reveals that “1,992 African-Americans committed suicide, 1,621 committed were by African-American Males.



While it was once thought that psychologists and dentists were most likely to commit suicide due to pressures and strains brought on by their respective professions, suicide has become more prevalent amongst people of all walks of life and professions. Most people have been in situations where they may have thought that the other side of life would be better. Many don’t act on their thoughts because they are equipped with skills that lend the ability to cope. It is important to note for those who consider suicide, the signs of suicide can be a direct and/or indirect outcry.

Awareness is the key to recognizing the signs and compassion is the emotion that directs those who recognize the warning signs, to reach out in prevention. Considering those who contemplate or commit suicide, the reasoning behind the behavior is varied. Death of a loved one, loneliness, loss of a job, victim of violence, bullying, sexual abuse, divorce, incarceration, chronic and terminal illnesses, and financial oppression are all reasons some commit suicide.



Never discount the way someone else is feeling. Depression is real. It does not make one any less human or inferior to anyone else. However, those who suffer from depression are more likely to commit suicide. Isolation from the world and those around them is one driving point of no return. Depression often goes unnoticed but there are clinical signs that can be observed by the untrained eye.



Weight loss and/or gain of 25 pounds in a month time is a major indicator of someone suffering from depression. When an individual begins to give away his or her possessions for seemingly no reason, it is a strong chance they are contemplating suicide.



Not all individuals suffer in silence. Some people cry out for help with words requesting help to escape suicidal thoughts. Ominous and sullen words expressing loss of hope are often spoken by those considering suicide. These words must be taken serious by those who hear them. Be an encouraging ear and offer words of support and direction to those in need of help. It is important to stress that as humans, we all go through challenging times; it is a part of life. When we are aware that most of life circumstances are not unique to one individual we normalize the human experience, making it slightly easier to cope.



If you are not equipped to assist someone who displays suicidal behavior offer guidance to those in need by suggesting they seek professional help and services. Tell someone else who is willing and able to lend assistance if the situation is too awkward or beyond you, but please don’t ignore the signs. There are telephone call centers people can call and trained professionals that can aide in the prevention of suicide. It is imperative to be aware of the signs and symptoms as well as be willing to assist if you are aware.



Resources
MedicineNet.com - http://www.medicinenet.com/suicide



American Association of Suicidology - http://www.suicidology.org/c/document_library/get_file?folderId=232&name=DLFE-20.pdf

For Assistance
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255



http://suicidehotlines.com/michigan.html



http://hopeline.com/

Date: 6/18/12
Writer’s Name: Sheri Henry-Harrigan
Title: The Game of Life

Suicide is a topic that hits home. According to the Center for Disease Control and Prevention the number of suicide deaths is up to 36,909. That is a pretty high number. It doesn’t include the growing number of people who are suicidal. What is causing people to become suicidal? What are the signs that a person is suicidal?

According to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline website these are the warning signs of suicide:

• Talking about wanting to die or to kill one’s self.
• Looking for a way to kill oneself, such as searching online or buying a gun.
• Talking about feeling hopeless or having no reason to live.
• Talking about feeling trapped or in unbearable pain.
• Talking about being a burden to others.
• Increasing the use of alcohol or drugs.
• Acting anxious or agitated; behaving recklessly.
• Sleeping too little or too much.
• Withdrawing or feeling isolated.
• Showing rage or talking about seeking revenge.
• Displaying extreme mood swings.

The signs listed above can also be associated with other disorders or problems such as bullying and depression. They are also causes of suicide. In order to recognize the warning signs of suicide, we must know the person. If a person used to be social and now they don’t want to go out or talk to anyone something is wrong. Don’t sit back and not do anything; you could be saving someone’s life. At one point a person may even say that they want to die or that they will kill themselves. Those words are not a joke even if the person seems to be joking. Immediately get the police involved!

   

So what is one to do when a person displays any of these warning signs? The first thing to do is to get them some professional help. If that doesn’t work then the Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK is available. Suicide isn’t a joke and most people don’t realize that they are contributing factors to the issues of a person. They say “sticks and stones can break my bones but words will never hurt me.” Well that saying is a lie! Words do hurt and if they come from someone that you love they will never be forgotten. I have been hurt by loved ones my whole life. Now that I have a child of my own I will never let him feel the heartache I felt growing up.

   

As a person that was at one point suicidal I know how hard it can be to deal with certain issue; like when there is no one to talk to or nowhere to go or when people make fun of you and constantly put you down. My suicidal attempts came from the pressures of trying to please everyone. Living my life knowing I was by myself even though I had all these people around, made me so depressed that I attempted to slit my wrist at the age of twelve just to escape the hell I lived. I have so many suicidal stories of my own that it isn’t funny. However I managed to cope with my depression by seeking professional help. And I urge you or anyone you know to do the same. It helps and can prevent a tragic accident from destroying a family.

   

Life to me is just a game that we are all trying to win. But we all are not dealt the same cards. We must take the cards that we are dealt with and try to end up with a good hand. For some it will come easy, for others it will be hard. The goal is not to give up because once you do you lose. Giving in to depression and other issues takes you out of the game. I understand that times get hard because I have been there and done that but you can rise above it with the right help.

Date: 06/14/2012
Writer Name: Donnell Hicks   
Journal Topic: The Truth Behind Suicide

There are various factors that play a role into a person committing suicide. Take bullying for example.  A child who feels threatened and overwhelmed by the other children at school that are bullying him may find that committing suicide is a much easier task than having to confront the other kids at school who are bullying him. There are many things that can create this sort of tension amongst people that in the end could possibly result in suicide. These things may include biases against a person’s gender preference, a person’s background and culture, and even a person’s socioeconomic status.

Outside of cultural biases and negative societal influences, another factor that can put one at a great risk for committing suicide is depression. The most common example amongst them are war veterans.  

The following tables highlight other types of risk factors associated with suicide and the warning signs family and friends should look for.

Mental Health Illnesses

Bipolar

Schizophrenia

Anxiety

Warning Signs

Writing about death

Withdrawing from family and friends

Feeling helpless and/or hopeless

Displaying feelings of strong rage and anger towards family

Acting Recklessly

Poor performance in school and/or at work

Loss of employment

Death in a family

Deep traumatic childhood experience



What to Look for

Alcohol and/or drug use and dependency

Change in personality and/or mood swings

Loss of interest in social activities

Feeling trapped



According to suicide.org, seventy-five percent of people who take their own lives exhibit suicide warnings. Furthermore, the statistics between African-Americans and Caucasians is a very overwhelming contrast. The numbers for African-Americas that commits suicide is 1,957 (while the death ratio is 0.7%); and the numbers for Caucasians who commits suicide is 27,710 (while the death ratio for Caucasians is 75.9%).

   

When coming across someone, whether a friend or a family member who threatens to take his or her own life, there are important steps you can take to avoid a tragedy from happening. First, always take suicide comments seriously. Secondly, try not to act shock. Third, get help right away. DO NOT handle the situation alone. Listen carefully and comfort the person. Lastly, be deeply concerned. DO NOT leave him or her alone.

Talk openly about suicide.  To avoid a loved one from ending his or her life, take these precautions to heart. This is a major issue that hurts everyone involved, especially the community. We may live in a chaotic world that drives a different part of us to the brink of destruction, but we cannot fall into the temptation of easing the pain by killing ourselves - for the reason that the agony will linger onto family and friends who will carry on that heartache.

Overall, we are all faced with enormous challenges in life, even overcoming thoughts of suicide. So remember, the simplest way a person can counter the need to end his or her life is to talk to someone regarding their problems. Seek spiritual and mental guidance. By doing so, it’ll make a big difference.