Date: 7/1/12
Writer’s Name: Sheri Henry-Harrigan
Title: Looks are not everything
What does a real man look like? There is no definite answer based on physical appearance. A real man can be the homeless man on the corner or the CEO of a company. We don’t know what men are real until we get to know them.
The homeless man on the corner can be a real man because despite his situation he is still trying to make something for his family. Real men don’t dwell on their circumstances. They figure out ways to keep themselves and their families together. But does society give a man in that situation credit? No, because he doesn’t have any means to provide for his family; so we say he isn’t a real man. I say he is if he has not abandoned his responsibility and is doing the best that he can.
Real men come in all shapes and sizes and colors. The characteristics of what makes a good man are very lengthy in my book. I can tell you what a real man is not. Real men do not dodge their responsibilities. If they make a child they take care of him or her. If they aren’t the bread winners they don’t make their mate pick up all the slack. They do what they can with what they have. Some even go beyond that (which is another topic). Real men do not disrespect women. For the same respect he shows his mother and sister is what other women will get. Real men do cry. There is nothing wrong with crying. It shows that you are human. Real men keep it real. Lying and game playing is for little boys.
My prime example of a real man is my husband Jemel Harrigan. We do not have any children together. I have a two year old and my husband has been in my son’s life since he was six months. He has taken on the role of father figure to my son. Not because he has to but because he wanted to. The bond that he has with my son is amazing and it is something my son will never get from his biological father. Being a father to someone else’s kids is a commendable act. I salute all the stepfather’s, uncles, brothers, and all the men that are standing in for a dead beat.
When I asked the question of what a real men looked, like women were giving me the names of some attractive celebrities. Trey Songz, Idris Elba, Denzel Washington, etc. We don’t even know these men to say that they are real men. It’s not about what one looks like but what they can do for those in their lives. Real men are not lazy. They know there is work to be done and strive to get to the point of greatness. They admit their wrongs and try to fix their mistakes. Looks have nothing to do with it. A man can look good on the outside but be so ugly on the inside.
We need to stop judging men on their looks. This is why so many women have fine fathers for their kids but they aren’t around. Take it from me. Looks are not everything. After dealing with three failed relationships, I stopped looking at the outside. What I found was a man that would die for me. That would give me his last. He puts my love on top. Why? Because that’s what a real man does!
Writer’s Name: Sheri Henry-Harrigan
Title: Looks are not everything
What does a real man look like? There is no definite answer based on physical appearance. A real man can be the homeless man on the corner or the CEO of a company. We don’t know what men are real until we get to know them.
The homeless man on the corner can be a real man because despite his situation he is still trying to make something for his family. Real men don’t dwell on their circumstances. They figure out ways to keep themselves and their families together. But does society give a man in that situation credit? No, because he doesn’t have any means to provide for his family; so we say he isn’t a real man. I say he is if he has not abandoned his responsibility and is doing the best that he can.
Real men come in all shapes and sizes and colors. The characteristics of what makes a good man are very lengthy in my book. I can tell you what a real man is not. Real men do not dodge their responsibilities. If they make a child they take care of him or her. If they aren’t the bread winners they don’t make their mate pick up all the slack. They do what they can with what they have. Some even go beyond that (which is another topic). Real men do not disrespect women. For the same respect he shows his mother and sister is what other women will get. Real men do cry. There is nothing wrong with crying. It shows that you are human. Real men keep it real. Lying and game playing is for little boys.
My prime example of a real man is my husband Jemel Harrigan. We do not have any children together. I have a two year old and my husband has been in my son’s life since he was six months. He has taken on the role of father figure to my son. Not because he has to but because he wanted to. The bond that he has with my son is amazing and it is something my son will never get from his biological father. Being a father to someone else’s kids is a commendable act. I salute all the stepfather’s, uncles, brothers, and all the men that are standing in for a dead beat.
When I asked the question of what a real men looked, like women were giving me the names of some attractive celebrities. Trey Songz, Idris Elba, Denzel Washington, etc. We don’t even know these men to say that they are real men. It’s not about what one looks like but what they can do for those in their lives. Real men are not lazy. They know there is work to be done and strive to get to the point of greatness. They admit their wrongs and try to fix their mistakes. Looks have nothing to do with it. A man can look good on the outside but be so ugly on the inside.
We need to stop judging men on their looks. This is why so many women have fine fathers for their kids but they aren’t around. Take it from me. Looks are not everything. After dealing with three failed relationships, I stopped looking at the outside. What I found was a man that would die for me. That would give me his last. He puts my love on top. Why? Because that’s what a real man does!
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